I feel like there’s no where I can vent to, so coming on my dusty ass page to do so.
I feel like there’s nothing I can do anymore for this person. They’re begging for a friendship when I’m apparently horrible to them. I hurt their feelings and make them feel bad all the time. I told them to let’s not be friends, but it still feels like she’s watching over my shoulder. If I can’t be a good friend to her, then why can’t she leave me alone? What is making her want this friendship? I don’t regret the things I have said, because I’ve ever only told her how she has hurt me, and somehow that was an attack on her. I’ve told her how she’s not a good friend to me, it’s an attack on her. I don’t know how to please someone who doesn’t please me.
This is the most intense year I’ve had since 2012/2013. I’m not even overly sad, I’m honestly just exhausted. Numb. I don’t feel like I have fight in me anymore. I’m tired of life. I’m tired of getting beat down when I finally feel like I’m breaking through.